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Birthday Preasent
Author: Robin Lane
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(Added on Nov 28, 2004)
(This month 30503 readers) (Total 79590 readers) |
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A woman comes home to find that a friend from her past has left her a very special birthday gift. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 13 |
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15% |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (9/10) |
| Average
Rating: (9/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (10/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (4/10) |
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| Reviewer:
JimmyJump
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jan 28, 2009 |
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This is excellent fantasy-fodder. An almost comic-bookish reality, where anything is possible, with a sweet, delicious, endearing devoted slave in the form of Tittygirl.
Extremely well written, with a rich, inventive and enticing language. Only minor flaws are some excrutiating spelling errors, but they don't take anything away from the delicous content.
Well done, Robin Lane!
JJ (10/10)
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Sep 19, 2006 |
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I found it increadably hot great job (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
sunburststrat
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 5, 2005 |
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I had to bail midway through the story ... too nervous about that sweet pregnant slave getting seriously injured. Normally I abstain from reviewing a story that is too heavy for my tastes, but this author is just amazing. Loved the scene where the slave is shown her cell, and the way the slave reacted. It was as if I could see and feel that cage for myself. And what a fine submissive this slave is. Very talented writer! (9/10)
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- Replied by:
Robin Lane
(Edit) (Mar 5, 2005)
- Thank you so very much, fine Sir. Please be advised that I wrote this story some years ago when I was a newly collared slave to my (Ex)Mistress, and my blood was still boiling with the excitement and energy of my introduction to BDSM, and I was weak with awe and devotion to my Mistress. (I became Dominant later... that's another story.) I was overwhelmed with new emotions that were exploding inside of me, and writing stories, I felt, served as the a kind of safety valve to give my enthusiasm direction when my Mistress wasn't around. I was also new to authorship as well, and didn't really do a lot of rewriting or fact-checking back then. My other stories posted on this sight, written within the last year, show considerably more discipline. I hope you will read them and enjoy them.
Mistress Robin
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| Reviewer:
Cokera
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Dec 8, 2004 |
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This story really stired up emotions and fired the imagination as to what was to come next as well as the story before this tale. I would really like to read more in additional chapters or maybe a previous story about the characters past as a submissive. All in all a unusual and intense scenario. A tribute to the library for sure. (10/10)
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| Reviewer:
Kingcodez
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Dec 2, 2004 |
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Great Job. The characters were well presented. Like mrnsty I would also like to see more about Tittygirl (Love the Name heh) & Diane's beginnings with Lady Amber. You could very well have a good series going :)
-Codez (9/10)
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- Replied by:
Robin Lane
(Edit) (Dec 4, 2004)
- Thank you for reviewing my story, good boy. I am unsure, at this point, that there will be more stories involving Tittygirl and her Mistress. But with the increasing number of e-mails I am getting (and the stirrings in my imagination involving pregnant submissive slave sluts <grin>) that possibility has increasing, though still small, chances of becoming real. Keep watching. I can't promise anything, but it MAY happen.
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| Reviewer:
mrnsty
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Dec 1, 2004 |
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Although I liked the story I have to knock it down a few points just for safety of tittygirl and her baby. That said, this author understands dominance. And I do appreciate that. Everytime I read her stories, I feel I learn something...well, something I can use lol.
Things missing in the story that I'd like to see in sequels if there are to be any are, some hint, or information about how tittygirl ended up at Lady Amber's, the significance of the desire for pregnant girl to Diane and Diane's plans for a pregnant girl as birthtime comes closer. (8/10)
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- Replied by:
Robin Lane
(Edit) (Dec 1, 2004)
- Thank you for reviewing my story, Good Sir. I doubt if I will resurect this tale any further than I have already done. Another reviewer pointed out the same faults you did. You can read the other reviews to see my explanations. The truth, though, is if an author must explain herself outside the story, she hasn't done a good job in the story. As such, I now believe that I posted this story prematurely... out of vanity, because I have recieved a large number of e-mails from readers frustrated that I have not posted more. And for that, I must apologise to you and to all those who read this story. I promise that, in the future, anything I post will recieve closer scruteny.
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| Reviewer:
Ruby
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Nov 30, 2004 |
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I gave it a nine - because the danger to the baby and mother was over the top with the enema.
"The water was ice cold. Perfect! She grinned like a naughty little girl as she held the red rubber enema bag up under the faucet. The flow made a high-pitched bubbling noise as it filled the bag almost to the rim... almost a whole gallon of clear cold water making the sides of the bag bulge and strain with against the weight."
Let's think about this:
1. Pregnant moms need room temp enemas.
2. Colder water can cause shock.
3. Hotter water can overheat baby.
4. Way too much water is used for our otherwise "realistic" story. It's always exciting to exagerate, but 1 cup is plenty. A gallon held for long periods of time can sink into the body.
Even though it's only water -
overdosage or retention may lead to severe electrolyte disturbances, including hypernatremia, hyperphosphatemia, hypocalcemia, and hypokalemia, as well as dehydration and hypovolemia, with attendant signs and symptoms of these disturbances (such as metabolic acidosis, renal failure, and tetany). Certain severe electrolyte disturbances may lead to cardiac arrhythmia and death.
(Taken from a Fleet enema warning.)
So...enjoy the fantasy, but in reality, let's place nice with our slaves. Aftercare and a
warm blanket would be appreciated. And let's not leave our pregnant slaves alone after such a rough session. While I'm ranting - a warm room and a safe place for an emergency delivery, a call button for help...damn, give your pain slut the best and she'll last a lot longer. Baby, too. (9/10)
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- Replied by:
Robin Lane
(Edit) (Dec 1, 2004)
- You are absolutely right, of course. This story was taken from a group of my first efforts at writing. There are a couple of interesting facts regarding that. 1) I wrote this on my first computer. 2) I was a submissive... at the time... under the thumb of my first Mistress, and 3) I had no idea, back then, that I had ANY kind of writing talent, and did no research. I should have looked closer at it before I submitted it. At that particular time of my life, my head was filled with many wonderful fantasies of what my future would be like as a slave. I imagined myself living happily in my cage, waiting for that moment when my Mistress would lift the latch so I could crawl out to her, kiss her feet, and beg her to take her pleasure with me. I had no idea, then, what was realistic and what wasn't. All I had was my fantasies; enemas and pregnancy among them. Now, of course, I know better. (Thank you, Madam Claudia, my Mentor, for training me to dominate.) As I recall, my Mistress had given me my first erotitc enema just a few days before I wrote this story. I had no idea how much water she used, but to me it felt enormous! I was sure it had to have been measured in gallons! Thank you for pointing this out. My future stories will be receive closer scruteny and editing.
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| Reviewer:
Mobius
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Nov 30, 2004 |
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I am in the middle of the story. Sadly I had to go to work and could not finish it. But rest assured it has my undevided attention. I like the story it has some very interesting points. The humiliation slut is pregnant. What is to become of the baby. Will she raise the child as her own or leave the baby with the slave to be raised as a slave? Interesting. I hope you will continue the story and I look forward to finishing what you have writen so far. Keep going you have my interest. (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
malelesbian
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Nov 29, 2004 |
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Thank you Mistress Robin! And you are as much a Mistress of the pen as you are of the best slavegirls. This simple, delightful tale puts us subtly, yet firmly, in the skin of Mistress Diane, and with her we enjoy all the thrills and excitement she feels as she plays with her new toy! We felt the sparkles in Diane's sensitive girl-bits when she gave a her new slavegirl a new, and very degrading, name... Tittygirl! We got to watch Diane's pregnant slave perform her prancing pony dance with all of the appropriate bits of girl flesh in full jiggle, feel her soft lips on our feet as she expressed her gratitude, and feasted our eyes on the spectical of Tittygirl's sparkling tears running down her face. Robin, your gift for burning your characters' emotions into our imaginations is also your gift to us. Your stories are visions rendered in the murcurial fabric of language. You bring to vibrant life, in our mind's eye, charactorizations and situations that might have been too simple, and common to be real... and would have been, if they had come from the imagination of any other author of erotica. Mistress Diane sound like she could have been my friend next door. (Why DOES she keep that celler door locked?) Tittygirl was a unique, well-concieved delight... sweet, eager, and wonderfully nasty and slutty... just like a good, well trained slavegirl should be. And... damn it... I want to play in Diane's dungeon! I saw, plain as day, the brutally barren gray walls, feel the damp floor under my feet, heard the creeking grind of the cage door as it swung on it's rusty hinges, and squinted at the harsh light from the lights. And oh... how I wish I had friends who gave me gifts like that! (Don't we all?)
Madam (may I call you that?) you have a very precious and highly prized and saught after gift... the ability to reach gently into our souls, find the most secret desires of our hearts, and set them ablaze with new life and color, white hot with fresh energy. As in your previous tales, we cannot come away without feel just a bit changed... like your charactors. This story, simple as it was, let us feel an almost childlike joy at recieving an exciting gift from a beloved friend. And yet we were allowed to appreciate that joy with an adult's strength, freedom, and passion.
Your stories are more than erotica, more than fiction, and more than gems of literature. They are pathways into the fertile valley where your enchanting fantasies are nurtured to life. I myself am a Dominant man, and enjoy my rare opportunities to indulge my passions, whip in hand and happy slavegirl at my feet. But, as an afficianado of fine fiction, with a special appreciation for superior erotica like this, I have come to trust you and feel confident in the knowledge that, when I see your name in the byline, I can safely surrender my imagination and consious thought, suspend my intellectual disbelief, and let you lead me, like a slave on a leash, down into that valley. You have an adoring fan in me... a slave to your wizardry with the words, and like the slaves in your stories, I am in awe of your power to rule my heart for the span of the tale, and I kneel before you in humble gratitude for your gifts to us. There are many fates in this world that are far, far worse than this, even for a dominant. (10/10)
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- Replied by:
Robin Lane
(Edit) (Dec 1, 2004)
- Wow! I did that? Shame on me! (Giggle...)
Sir, I must insist that you do NOT call me Mistress. I have not earned that respect from you, nor have you earned the privilege of calling me by that title. That's not me being mean. It's just that the title 'Mistress' is not something I take lightly. Like a fine bullwhip, the terms 'Mistress' and 'slave' can inflict great harm and sorrow on the innocent if it they are not wielded with respect. That said, I am very grateful to you for your passionate affirmation of my writing skills. And... you are welcome as well. It is my joy to let you walk in my garden. After all, you are the reader, the very reason I planted that garden and harvest it's fruits. Thank you, good sir, for partaking of my gifts. I am very happy and thankful for the opportunity to share them with you. Please... walk in my garden.
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| Reviewer:
ms2bused
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Nov 29, 2004 |
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The absolute epitome of sensuality and her ever increasing ability to have the reader become the savaged one in the story!
If only she could write more often! (10/10)
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- Replied by:
Robin Lane
(Edit) (Nov 29, 2004)
- Thank you, good sir! You flatter me, and being the lusty Mistress I am, I confess that I really do LOVE flattery. You should all be more careful! I may develope delusions of grandure! Seriously though, you are better than kind. I also wish I could write more often. However, I believe that one of reasons my stories attract so much praise is because I deliberately do NOT write more often. I am very grateful to the Powers of Heaven, (God, if you would rather have a name,) for blessing me with such talent as is mine to command. I give conscious respect to that talent, and I always strive to not squander it on mountains of 'whacking material' that is forgotten almost as quickly as it is read. I give each story I write the attention and it deserves. I develope my charactors until they come to life of their own accord, build their worlds with the same care I would want an architect to use when designing my home, and honing the plot until the story has all the elements it needs, without an single word left unused if it is required to make my vision clear or left to take up space on the page, and the readers valuable time, if it is not needed. I want you, and all my readers, to think of my characters as if they were close friends whose lives you know, living in a colorful world that you can recognize and appreciate, and having experiences, relationships, and emotions that inspire and intrigue you. YOU are the reason I write, dear sir, along with all the others who know and appreciate my work. You are also the reason I don't have more stories for you to enjoy. I want to be proud of the stories I present to you, and be worthy of the gift you give me... that short portion of your life that you spend reading my work.
- Replied by:
ms2bused
(Edit) (Nov 30, 2004)
- I am SO grateful for your reply and am flattered by it!
However, I am NOT a "Sir" as you indicated in your answer to my review but a femme, submissive female; truly the reverse of your inherant nature!
I am a new and very avid fan and look forward immensely to your future postings!
Avidly,
neenee (JaneenMarie O'Brien)
- Replied by:
Robin Lane
(Edit) (Dec 1, 2004)
- My sincerest appologies, little one. I did not check your bio for any information about you. That was wrong of me. (I hate it when a submissive points out my shortcomings!<giggle>) Thank you for being so curtious in your response. I am glad you enjoyed my story, and rest assured there WILL be more.
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| Reviewer:
Aeneas
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Nov 28, 2004 |
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Another excellent story from the author. One of the most eloquent testamonies to the submissive state. Although the subject matter may not be for everyone, the author clearly states it in the categories. I look forward to new works from Ms Lane and her exploration of the ynig-yang of the bdsm community. (10/10)
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- Replied by:
Robin Lane
(Edit) (Nov 28, 2004)
- Thank you so much, dear sir! You are more than kind. Appreciation like this is the reason I keep writing.
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| Reviewer:
Dürrer
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Nov 28, 2004 |
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(4/10)
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- Replied by:
Robin Lane
(Edit) (Nov 29, 2004)
- I'm so sorry you were disappointed. Even if you were not, however, I would STILL strive to do a better job with my next effort. Maybe my future offerings will be more to your liking.
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