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Hilda’s two Masters
part 15 of 22
BTW:
English
as a global MEETING-LANGUAGE.
At least since the
colonial time the genuine English people are used to hear their language in
many variations and with accents, as Afrikaans, American, and Australian a s o and they normally have learned to understand it very
well.
Beside of
OXFORD-ENGLISH, there is a new and another variation of English that has been
developed mostly as a MEETING-LANGUAGE.
People, with their own
mother-language, from all over the BIG World use the meeting-language to get in
contact with others at f ex Internet.
In this type of
English it is accepted to NOT be all grammatically correct as long as the text
is moderately understandable; otherwise you stop reading it and don’t care!
That is the price many
millions gladly will pay for the benefit of many stories and knowledge, from
all over the world, which they otherwise couldn’t assimilate.
I can’t see that
anyone owns a language.
The story is still
slow and Hilda is ambivalent and egoistic.
In a
humble tone.
Cecilita
Cecilitasv70@hotmail.com
HILDA:
I think I laid on the
floor in five minutes or more and the pleasure-waves had been replaces by
thrilling and some very nice convulses that shook my body from time to time,
but everything slowed down. I had started to breathe normally and it felt good
in my lungs when I took one deep breathe after another.
I felt a little bad
conscience for taking his time with me on his floor, but he had ordered me to
do it. Then I understood that he had seen signs that I was close to a fainting
by overstraining and that was why he had me on the floor, of course.
He sat on his stool
and looked down at me with his nice, calm and seeing-through eyes.
I felt a very great
respect for him and a so strong acknowledgement of him as my Master that I
wanted to lay in the order-position at the floor just to pay tribute to him.
I lay there and try to
let my body and feelings landing. If he wanted me up from the floor, he would
say so. He was the Master.
I was so grateful to
him that I had tears in my eyes when I looked up on him. I felt it as my heart
was going to burst and felt more tears coming.
I like Him. No, I
actually love him! He make me feel so calm and happy at my inside that I
started to miss it before I loose it, as I know I would when this week-end was
over. Maybe I would have other deep feelings and pleasure-waves and thrilling
in my body, as rewards, but this was something else. I felt, in a very distinct
feeling, that I could do absolutely anything to stay with him and absorb the
calmness in his present.
I suddenly found out,
naked and resting on his floor, that I never had loved a person before in my
whole life, except from my father. I have also loved my mother, but in a
different way though I never an
authority–respect for her, she was just mother.
I had thought that I
had loved guys, many times, but now I know for sure that I didn’t know what
love was, before this very moment, naked on the floor in older man’s kitchen!
My father had said: “You
will know love, when you meet it. You will feel it in your heart, but also in
your backbone!”
Now I felt in every
nerve in my body and mind exactly what my father meant.
I loved this
There was the
deed-of-gift, but I must think of my happiness and my pleasure. Master Micke had stressed, “Think about it and don’t rush!” When shall I learn to simply obey?
Now I wished that
Master Micke had given my stubborn bottom a good
thrashing.
I remembered that
Rebecca had said that He was the new Messiah and we had all openly laughed at
her. Everyone knew that Rebecca was a fanatic and by that she was easily fixed
in ideas and feelings.
In her
one-way-thinking there was only religion to compare with. He, on the contrary,
stood on science ground, plus something more that I couldn’t put my finger at.
Now I understood what
she had detected in Him, His kindness, and infectious calmness and
seeing-through eyes. There was of course his capacity to mediate an inner
happiness, His knowledge and hidden power to give a girl inner pleasures and
delights. But most of all those
invisible waves He was sending over to me, that make me feel good and calm
inside. I felt now inside of me a welcoming calmness that I never had felt in
my life before. I can imagine what he could do to a nervous person. If I had
knew about Him when I earlier in my life felt anxiety and nervousness I had run
to Him or crawled to Him.
But I strongly felt
that I for the first time in my life felt pure love. I loved Him. Though I
hastily had signed a deed-of-gift on myself and no longer was free, I loved
Him. My egoistic self had gladly broken the deed-of-gift if He just had given
me a sign, but my conscience had stopped me, I hope – or hope not.
And still I can’t say
that I regret signing of the deed-of-gift; no, I have learned that one shall never regret a decision that was taken
before one got the final result in life.
- You can stand up
when you want to!
- Thank you Master!
I felt so grateful and
so humble and slavish. My body had rested enough and now I was curious on the
rest of the day. I stood quickly up into the order-position.
I liked this position
more than ever. In the same time as I stretched my muscles to hold my body in
exact position, it also felt like a recumbent position for my body and it felt
so “damn” right to mark my slave-girl ship in it.
Now I knew the code
for the delighted waves! Obedience!
I felt so humble and
slavish that I wanted to crawl on the floor for Him to see my humbleness. I was
His slave-girl now.
He sat in His stool
and I ogled at “my” place and regretted that I had put a plate for me to, as if
I presumed that I, a slave-girl, was allowed to sit at the table, just because
he had allowed it before.
A slave-girl must
learn to know her place! Sadly to say I felt the real slave-girl thoughts
constantly being attacked by my own egoism. I hated to be an egoist as it
prevents me from being a good slave-girl.
Master Micke had told me that He was my Master when I was here and
I felt in my whole body that He was my Master. Those new feelings, the
wonderful nice waves in my body when I obeyed Him made me wanting nothing else
than obey Him. And I wanted to stay. The strong yearning to stay followed the
waves and made me feel them stronger.
My mind started to
freely flew away in fantasies of how He could use me as his slave-girl. It was
very private yearnings from my time with Mats that took place in my brain. I
felt it strongly that if He just gave me a hint of letting me stay, there was
absolutely no ways He couldn’t use me in. But when my
fantasies started to build up scenarios of me naked crawling around on the
floor for his friends, my common sense put a stop to it. It didn’t fit
for him. He wasn’t that type of man. And I tried to excuse my fantasies as it
only was a way to show that I would have absolutely NO limits if He allowed me
to stay, but also to show my humbleness before Him and devotion to Him.
I also reduce my own
ego to a level where I didn’t even felt the pleasure-waves and the
thrilling-delight, but then my common sense told me that I was not trustworthy
anymore, so I gave that up, knowing myself.
Still loving him deep
in my heart I fell back to my normally me and I felt an enormous earning for
Him to give me a very difficult order so I could experience those most extreme
waves. But it seemed as He didn’t want to do it. I had begged for it and He
knew that I wanted him to do it.
Use me! My God, what
is it? I wanted it so infinitely willingly. What if my own will didn’t count at
all?
It was in that way it
worked, He said, the more difficult order for me to execute, the more pleasure
for me. It was so tempting.
It had nothing to do
with Him, but how I experienced it. My value was important.
Master Micke had let me taste my
own value as a woman and I think that he wanted to develop it in me.
But I hoped that he
would mix it with me being a slave-girl, with no value. Everything gets it power from its opposite.
I felt that I would
rather stand in order-position and waited on His table.
Suddenly the answer
hit me. My thoughts were all the time circulating around what I wanted and how I could experience the
fantastic pleasure. It was badly wrong for a slave-girl to be that egoistic. I
must learn to think like a real slave-girl. Perhaps He could teach me?
Of course that was
also the reason for him to not order
me anything difficult. If I wanted it, it would also loose it value of a difficult order and reduce the
pleasure.
Could it be that He
wouldn’t do it for He knew, as long as I wanted to do it, it wasn’t giving me
any real pleasure-waves?
Yes, of course. Thank
you Master for letting me understand it, I whispered to my self.
Must He wait for me to
not wanting it?
Perhaps that kind of
difficult order must hit me as a blow, coming out of the blue.
To punish myself for
bad and egoistic thinking, I wished that He would give me a real trashing on my
bare bottom. I must learn to think as a slave-girl and instead wait for what He
had in store for me. I must submit to His
will, not mine.
Probably a thrashing
from him would be the most wonderful experience for me and not a punishment at
all.
I must wait for him to
take the lead so I stood there and waited for him to react and direct me.
There must be no wrong
in wanting to feel those fantastic pleasures, that’s why he had put them there,
but I must wait for his initiative and order.
Further more I think
that it is an old fashion opinion that a slave-girl must suffer all the time as
long as she isn’t a pain-slut. His new school showed a new way, that she was
inner rewarded for her obedience and quickness, and even her own eagerness and
willingness to submit to her Master and to execute the most difficult orders
with no hesitation.
I started to slowly
get it now.
As he didn’t give me
an order of what to do I used the time left over to reflect on his treatment
here.
He needed girls and
women for his experiments to elaborate his research further.
Other girls had
contacted him via Anna (and Cecilita) to voluntarily be his “guinea-pigs” and
with that meet “The Universe of female orgasm and pleasure”.
But I had a Master who
arranged it for me. I felt a certain thrill when I thought of it like Master Micke had applied for my voluntarily ness to come here.
I had not applied my
self; my Master took care of that for me. As a real Master I took complete care
for his slave-girl and that felt so good!
I wish that he would
give me an order, any one.
As if He could read my
mind, or perhaps noticed me ogle ling at “my place”, He nodded at the stool and
said:
- Sit!
Something inside of me
loved that it was a distinct and firm order “Sit!” and not a “please sit down”.
- Yes Master!
I sat so fast that I
heard the “smack” when my bottom-flesh hit the wooden-seat at the stool and
felt the reward, but only as little wave, as nice shudder, but much more
pleasant.
The thrills and the
waves had a clear sexual approach, as they hit my genitals, but this shudder
was more bodily, but a delight.
I was so exciting to
see if these pleasures hold out all the way. He seemed to be convinced that it
would and by that I was sure as well.
We eat in silence. I
don’t like silence, I got no signal if He is pleased with me or not, and if not
why.
If you talk to a
person you can scan language-melody and intonation, and get signals if
something is wrong.
I had to wait and let
Him steer me. It felt good too, but I didn’t know Him yet.
It is always more
difficult to sit in silence with someone you don’t really know, though I knew
Him.
He was dominant and
would surely tell me if something was wrong. He knew that He was the Master and
as a Master that I was a simple slave-girl and I had no responsibility, more
than to obey Him. It was easy and incredible delightful.
I was ready before
him. He ate slowly, chewed carefully and looked in front of himself as through
me.
I wanted to speak, but
I didn’t dare to.
I wonder what was
going to happen now, I had experienced more in those few hours in this house
then I my whole life. That is no overstatement!
What will he do next?
Very demonstratively I
put down my knife, fork and spoon to let him know that I was ready. But what
was I ready for? Yes I was really ready for anything, anything.
I would gladly raise
and in the order-position wait for His order or wait at his table. I wanted to
give Him so much. He seemed to be true altruistic. Giving,
helping, treating without of anything for Himself, not even using His
slave-girl as He was in title to and in any way He wanted. I loved that
my Master Micke had handed over the Master-ship to
Him and had been happier if He used his right. Can a slave-girl want to be
used? I can, I’m an egoistic.
I sat silently and
waited. It was His orders that started my pleasure and I was yearning myself
crazy for His order.
This is early in the
day and there would be many more hours in this day and there was one day
tomorrow as well.
I thought of that, it
was His orders that released all those wonderful feelings and I found myself
dying for his order. It is madness, but miraculous.
I hoped of all my
heart to give more orders and I would obey him further more quickly.
My shame was gone and
I felt it but didn’t think about that I was nude all the time and in my every
movement. I wanted to attract his eyes with my naked body, as it did with other
men.
Maybe I’m conceited,
but I can’t remember that I ever felt needed to think so before, instead as
soon as I show anything that could be tempting for a mans eyes they had not
resist to look and that felt good. Little as power!
- ORDER-POSITION!
Could he read my
thoughts, or my body language? I let the steel-feather in my back-bone release
and bounce up to the order-position with recognizing smile over my face.
Now I got it verified,
an unimaginably and magnificent wave
rinsed over me. It was the reward for my quickness. But I demanded much more
quickness from my body. I’m an egoist. I hope that he could change me to a real
slave-girl.
- Yes Master!
I didn’t know if I was
supposed to say that, but I had got used to it when I stood in the
order-position, this time it came automatically. It was my confirmation to my
Master and that he had my full attention and stood ready to obey him.
The position felt so
submissive and was suppose to leave that signal.
It also felt so good
in my body to say so.
I waited and waited
and had all the time my eyes at Him, as I had learned at the girl-group’s
slave-girl-course and as Mats had trained me into.
I saw that he was
ready with his food and put down his knife, fork and spoon.
- Run in and sit in
the leather chair!
- Yes Master!
It was a so clear
order to RUN. It was difficult with doors when one is running. I was rewarded
with really nice thrilling in my body. I thought it was for the difficultness
with the doors.
In the room I throw my
naked body into the easy chair and leaned backwards. The cold leather made me
shiver but it was immediately replaced by a nice thrill. My God, how nice!
As in a after-flash I felt that the leather chair was cold to my
skin but I felt so far away and was so unimportant.
I was sitting naked in
a strange room and it felt so nice and so thrilling and alluring.
My heart was pounding,
but if it was by the excitement, the full speed race or the nice thrilling it
had caused, I don’t know. I’m not in that bad shape, that I would get a pulse
for a little running.
To the left at the
wall I saw an ornamental clock, which I haven’t seen before. But of course the
room wasn’t important at all last time I met the pleasure-waves in here.
It felt so
submissively nice to run at max speed and then sit here and wait for His
arrival. Even the thought gave me a nice thrilling through my body, as a
pleasant shiver.
I felt like a dog, max
speed and then much waiting.
I keep associating in
new and strange thoughts inside my head, but they felt so nice.
I wouldn’t mind being
a dog in this house. Think of crawling naked around on the floor and see His
legs when He walked around.
Or to roll up beside
his feet when he sat reading, listening at music or watched TV.
Perhaps shrink up my
body in his lap and be caressed or maybe, as his slave-girl caress him with my
mouth at the floor before him.
My God, I have never
had those madly thoughts before in my life. Had I been completely crazy?
Or is it only calm and
nice here with space for free thoughts crazy excursion in the wonderful and
safe world of fantasy?
But to stay here and
just rest my head, feelings and body, okay, obey him and letting the thoughts
rest in between.
No, I’m not allowed to
think those thoughts. I have a deed-of-gift hanging over me and I have to live
up to it. I have an owner!
It felt that my heart
beat and extra beat. An owner that owns me! My God, what a
lovely feeling.
If He had been my
owner He would be bound to keep me here in the house, how woderful!
I wondered if he would
start to give me orders, when he came into the room. Probably he would do that
to make me feel how it felt.
He told me before that
it was important that I was honest when I described how I felt it, so I must do
more to have something to exp0erience and tell him about.
Jesus, how could I be
anything else than honest to him?
I heard him
approaching and the door opened. I felt that my body wanted to quickly raise
and stand in the order-position, but I have to stop myself. He had told me to sit, so my body sat obediently. It felt
so good to be obedient to him.
What would happen next
in his fantastic care?
//
I
will continue if you are interested, otherwise I rest my eyes, fingers and
brain.
Translating
is a hard work, when you must let your thoughts be thrown between words from different
languages and weigh in a scale to make it balance and in the meantime not loose
the meaning and the message. But who
is perfect?
It
is easier to have grammar ideas if you only have one language to cling to;
I have four, at the bounds of five.
What
you read in 2 seconds or less I had to read, translated, weighed, write,
reread, changed, reread, write and reread in 20 minutes or more.
Still,
as a woman I’m driven by encouragement.
I
thank all those nice people who had taken their time to feed me with that.
/Cecilita
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